Tapsearch Com EditorAttitudes toward heterosexual marriage and the gay marriage debate
July 2nd 2007 22:53
For awhile now I've have a two-part view on gay marriage:
(1) The government should get out of marriage entirely, leaving individuals to sign contracts amongst themselves as they see fit -- and churches can decide which contracts to dignify with a ceremony.
(2) If the government must recognize marriages, it must do so on behalf of the people it represents. Those people don't want gay marriage as of now.
Regarding part 2, Rick Santorum has the best argument: The government doesn't recognize marriage for the good of those getting married; it recognizes marriage because it's the best mechanism for perpetuating our society. (Some counter that, following from that, we should ban childless heterosexual marriage. I responded to that in an American Spectator piece.)
Well, it seems Americans don't see their own marriages this way: A new survey reports that fewer and fewer of them view children as important to a marriage -- though they report their children give them personal fulfillment, and of course that's the most important thing!
Some findings:
Adults of all ages consider unwed parenting to be a big problem for society. At the same time, however, just four-in-ten (41%) say that children are very important to a successful marriage, compared with 65% of the public who felt this way as recently as 1990.
And:
Also, this very interesting tidbit on race:
Blacks are much less likely than whites to marry and much more likely to have children outside of marriage. However, an equal percentage of both whites and blacks (46% and 44%, respectively) consider it morally wrong to have a child out of wedlock. Hispanics, meantime, place greater importance than either whites or blacks do on children as a key to a successful marriage – even though they have a higher nonmarital birth rate than do whites.
No matter what this says for the "our government recognizes marriage for the sake of children" argument, it's downright scary that when asked what makes a marriage work, only 41 percent mention children, down 24 percent since 1990. It lost out to "faithfulness," "happy sexual relationship," "sharing household chores," "adequate income," "good housing," "shared religious beliefs" and "shared tastes and interests."
I suppose I should note, though, is that the question wasn't "what do you hope to get out of a marriage?" It was "what makes a marriage work?" Since plenty of people have great marriages without kids -- and few have great marriages while they're cheating on each other or broke -- it's arguable that the new rankings fit the available facts about marriage better.
By Robert VerBruggen
(1) The government should get out of marriage entirely, leaving individuals to sign contracts amongst themselves as they see fit -- and churches can decide which contracts to dignify with a ceremony.
(2) If the government must recognize marriages, it must do so on behalf of the people it represents. Those people don't want gay marriage as of now.
Regarding part 2, Rick Santorum has the best argument: The government doesn't recognize marriage for the good of those getting married; it recognizes marriage because it's the best mechanism for perpetuating our society. (Some counter that, following from that, we should ban childless heterosexual marriage. I responded to that in an American Spectator piece.)
Well, it seems Americans don't see their own marriages this way: A new survey reports that fewer and fewer of them view children as important to a marriage -- though they report their children give them personal fulfillment, and of course that's the most important thing!
Some findings:
Adults of all ages consider unwed parenting to be a big problem for society. At the same time, however, just four-in-ten (41%) say that children are very important to a successful marriage, compared with 65% of the public who felt this way as recently as 1990.
And:
Children may be perceived as less central to marriage, but they are as important as ever to their parents. As a source of adult happiness and fulfillment, children occupy a pedestal matched only by spouses and situated well above that of jobs, career, friends, hobbies and other relatives.
Also, this very interesting tidbit on race:
Blacks are much less likely than whites to marry and much more likely to have children outside of marriage. However, an equal percentage of both whites and blacks (46% and 44%, respectively) consider it morally wrong to have a child out of wedlock. Hispanics, meantime, place greater importance than either whites or blacks do on children as a key to a successful marriage – even though they have a higher nonmarital birth rate than do whites.
No matter what this says for the "our government recognizes marriage for the sake of children" argument, it's downright scary that when asked what makes a marriage work, only 41 percent mention children, down 24 percent since 1990. It lost out to "faithfulness," "happy sexual relationship," "sharing household chores," "adequate income," "good housing," "shared religious beliefs" and "shared tastes and interests."
I suppose I should note, though, is that the question wasn't "what do you hope to get out of a marriage?" It was "what makes a marriage work?" Since plenty of people have great marriages without kids -- and few have great marriages while they're cheating on each other or broke -- it's arguable that the new rankings fit the available facts about marriage better.
By Robert VerBruggen
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Comment by Cibbuano
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Comment by Anonymous
...
marriage
MAR'RIAGE, n. [L.mas, maris.] The act of uniting a man and woman for life; wedlock; the legal union of a man and woman for life. Marriage is a contract both civil and religious, by which the parties engage to live together in mutual affection and fidelity, till death shall separate them. Marriage was instituted by God himself for the purpose of preventing the promiscuous intercourse of the sexes, for promoting domestic felicity,and for securing the maintenance and education of children.
Marriage is honorable in all and the bed undefiled. Heb.13.
1. A feast made on the occasion of a marriage.
The kingdom of heaven is like a certain king, who made a marriage for his son. Matt.22.
2. In a scriptural sense, the union between Christ and his church by the covenant of grace. Rev.19.
...
The marriage argument changes shape when you start asking questions like, what is marriage, where did it come from, and why should I support it?
Comment by Tapsearch Com Editor
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It is impossible fore the State to play this part in vows of marriage. The State can set up rules for civil matters relating to two people wanting some kind union but it can never be called a marriage because it is outside of what God says a marriage should be.
Two people can make vows before God anywhere for Him to bless their union and God does everything according to a perfect order and this order does not allow two people of the same sex to be married in the eyes of God.
The State is a temporary order and can only function in this manner. Only a man and woman can vow their love to each other for eternity in marriage before God.
Outside this order, everything else is void in front of God and eternity.